This week I had the pleasure of attending an event hosted by the San Antonio LGBT Chamber of Commerce, and listened to Phil Bohlender speak. I previously met Phil at another event hosted by iEmpower, but we only exchanged names. Well today, I discovered that Phil has a 35 year corporate career holding numerous leadership and consulting roles with international experience.

I consider myself a champion of diversity, but in all honesty, I did not truly understand how someone’s sexual orientation was relevant in the workplace. I don’t recall ever asking nor worrying about someone’s sexual orientation neither in the workplace nor outside of it. So, my reason for attending was a genuine desire to listen, learn, and understand.

Phil started out by sharing personal experiences that started in the 80s. His presentation included a 2018 Harvard Business Review article by Trau, O’Leary, and Brown–7 Myths About Coming Out at Work. Most of the myths made sense, but I quietly thought to myself that #3 Coming out has nothing to do with work still did not make sense to me aside from dealing with individuals who may be prejudiced and/or closed minded.

What does Coming Out have to do with work?

What I loved about the event was the level of interaction by Phil and the audience that quickly allowed participants to share their experiences and ask questions. As I sat there taking in all the information, digesting ideas, an attendee spoke about the very myth that I did not truly understand. He stated that Coming Out does have to do with work. He mentioned that most companies have work functions where employee take their significant others or share stories about their families. So in his words, of course it matters.

That was my aha moment. wow

I thought of the many company Christmas parties and events that my wife attended with me. I though of the many internal contacts, mentors, and sponsors with whom I shared stories about my wife and kids. I thought of the many personal development events that encourage us to be authentic in the workplace, encourage professionals to gain exposure within your organization in order to climb up the ladder. I imagined someone who cannot be themselves at the workplace, cannot talk about their spouse or significant other.

I started to understand. Happy that I am still learning